Your Fertility, Your Terms – Try for $19/Month with a 30-Day Money-Back Guarantee.
Experiencing a miscarriage is an unimaginably personal and heartbreaking loss, one that often leaves people grieving in silence. If someone you care about has gone through this, it’s natural to feel unsure about what to say or do. But in moments like these, perfection isn’t what matters—what matters is showing up with compassion and empathy. Here’s how you can support someone during this painful and challenging time.
“I’m so sorry for your loss.”
These simple words go a long way. A miscarriage isn’t “just one of those things” or “meant to be”—it’s a loss of hopes, dreams, and plans for the future. By acknowledging their pain and validating their experience, you let them know their grief is seen and heard. Even if you can’t fully understand what they’re feeling, expressing your sorrow reassures them that they don’t have to face this alone.
“I’m here for you. Can I bring you dinner this week?”
Grief can be overwhelming, and everyday tasks may feel like too much. Instead of saying, “Let me know if you need anything,” offer specific, tangible help. Whether it’s bringing over a meal, checking in with a quick call, or simply sitting together in quiet support, these small gestures show that you care. It's also important to create a safe space for them to express their emotions without judgment or unsolicited advice. Avoid phrases like, “At least you know you can get pregnant,” or, “Everything happens for a reason,” as these can unintentionally minimize their pain. If they don’t feel ready to talk, that’s okay too—your presence and understanding can mean the world.
“This must be so hard. I can’t imagine how you’re feeling.”
You don’t need to fully understand their experience to acknowledge the depth of their grief. Avoid comparisons or attempts to cheer them up—grief isn’t something to fix, but something to walk through with support. Let them know their pain is real, valid, and seen. Simply recognizing their hurt can be a powerful way to show you care.
Phrases like:
“Everything happens for a reason.”
“You can always try again.”
“At least it happened early.”
… might come from a well-meaning place, but they can minimize their grief. Instead, focus on affirming their feelings. If you don’t know what to say, it’s okay to admit it.
“I don’t have the right words, but I’m here for you.”
Sometimes, saying less is more. If you're unsure of the right thing to say, expressing your desire to be there for them, without the pressure to fix or console, can be incredibly powerful. Vulnerability in acknowledging your limitations shows care and authenticity.
Grief isn’t linear, and there’s no “right” way or time to process a miscarriage. Don’t push them to “move on” or “look on the bright side.” Instead, check in periodically and remind them you’re thinking of them, even weeks or months later.
“I just wanted to let you know I’m still thinking about you. How are you doing today?”
It's especially meaningful to check in during times of the year that may be challenging, such as Mother’s Day, anniversary dates, or other days that can be hard when navigating loss and grief. These small gestures show that you acknowledge their ongoing journey and are there for them, no matter how long it takes.
Partners experience this loss in their own way, often while trying to stay strong for their loved one. A simple, “How are you holding up?” can go a long way in supporting them as well.
Sometimes, words aren’t necessary. A kind gesture like sending a card, flowers, or simply sitting with them can speak louder than anything you might say. Here are some small businesses offering thoughtful gifts to support those who have experienced pregnancy loss:
Navigating miscarriage grief is delicate, but your willingness to show up with kindness and compassion is what truly matters. Remember: it’s okay to feel uncomfortable or unsure—it’s the effort to be there that makes all the difference.
If you’ve gone through this yourself and are unsure how to support someone else, trust your intuition. Sometimes, the most comforting words come from those who’ve walked the path themselves.
Together, let’s make sure no one feels they have to grieve alone.
Take control of your fertility journey. Join our waitlist now and get early access to our platform, exclusive updates, and more.
